Abandonment.

Today I awoke with a list of names of once appeared to be lit up when I would previously glance at them for reassurance. As I look at this list now, I've noticed a lot of these lights have burned out and the ones that still appear working are barely burning. I'm tempted to rip this list and toss it behind me as I walk to separate myself from ever confronting a memory of any of those names. It's becoming an illusion, a predicted illusion, one of walking through the world as silent as if there isn't a choice at hand. I've yet to be thrown a reason to keep that folded, old and wrinkled piece of trash I place over my heart like any of the names on that list even want to be in such a position. Betrayal, abandonment, the sight of fading, these are the elements that exterminate the power and energy holding these lights which provide vision inside of my childish unguided mind. Now I roam in an abyss, I just continue on because I don't have the courage to break myself away from this state of feeling strung out so I toss this list and rumage through the world starving.....